Papaya Sunrise Green Smoothie

I officially don’t own flip flops.

This is a big deal. I live in California. It’s like a state requirement. At any moment the California police are probably going to walk into my house and take me away. I’ll be forced to explain to them that it’s not my fault that I am wearing shoes and socks in 90 degree heat. I will sell out the dog and explain that she has officially chewed up every pair of (expensive) flip flops that I own.  They will arrest both of us. We will end up in the same Women’s Correctional Facility. Emma will make my life hell and I will be labeled a “snitch” for ratting her out. She will chew up all of my bath slippers and I will be forced to shower without flip flops. I hear that’s a no go in prison. I’ve clearly been watching too much Orange is the New Black. Like, whoa. Prison tangent. Normal for a Tuesday.

My point is (if there is one), it totally sucks to wake up on a Monday morning and discover that both your Reef sandals and your husbands Rainbow sandals have been reduced to leathery spit balls. At the rate we are going, I will be shoeless by August. I will be relegated to digging in my closet to find the one pair of forgotten shoes that I can strap onto my feet. Is it going to be my ugg-style cat boots (highly misguided fashion choice) or will it be the slightly furry Birkenstock clogs that I obtained for free by Christmas caroling at the Birkenstock factory in 2001? Both choices sound pretty solid. Help.

One day, in my teaching years, I found myself wearing the aforementioned Birkenstock clogs to class. I was informed by a six year old that it looked like I was wearing a couple of sea otters on my feet. I think I replied with a simple, “They are.”  Gotta keep ’em guessing. […]

Banana Nut Granola With Quinoa

I am in the weeds, Friends. I will admit this to you wholeheartedly. I am truly behind. My kitchen has taken a backseat to life lately. Surely you understand this. I can’t be the only one who gets overwhelmed by life and ends up drinking one kind of smoothie, slapping ham on toast and eating handfuls of spinach straight out of the bag. This is a thing right? Besides baking different variations of this bread to cart off to my family, I have not exactly flexed the muscles in my food brain. It’s losing muscle mass. It’s sitting there in a smoothie rut. Flabby. We can’t have this, right? Let’s tell my food brain to wake up and go for a walk.
On Tuesday morning this is exactly what I did. I sprung out of bed and decided it was time to create something that was not toast. Also, my husband had been not so subtly hinting  for a couple of weeks that he would be utterly thrilled if I would replenish the granola stash. While we were grocery shopping he decided he might get some sort of sugary cereal, I told him I didn’t like his moves, he told me that if I made granola he wouldn’t even be considering it. Touche. Point taken. There was also a week where the empty granola canister kept appearing on the counter magically as if to say “GRANOLA! NOW!” I am not sure how it got there. I did not put it there. I don’t think the cat or the dog have the dexterity to grab the canister from out of the pantry and place it on the counter. This only leaves one human. I am not going to point fingers, but I will give you a hint…I am married to him. […]

Chocolate & Chia Pudding | Gluten Free & Vegan

Sometimes recipes can be  complicated.

Roasting and stirring and chopping and sifting and simmering maybe even some light blending.

I like these types of recipes as they provide a bit of a challenge. Sometimes you need a project. The day I made you this Shepherd’s Pie, I needed a project. It was serious. Chopping therapy was a welcome activity.

Sometimes recipes can be so simple they’re mildly embarrassing.

You throw a couple things together in a mason jar and the ingredients do the work for you.

That is THIS recipe. […]

Spinach, Chocolate & Peanut Butter Smoothie

I woke up this morning determined to move my body.

Yesterday, I made biscuits. I ate three of them. No big deal. No regrets. They were buttery and warm and delicious, but today I need to move.

I put on my stretchy pants, my sneakers, and a nice long sleeve shirt and headed out the door.

I then headed right back in the door. IT’S SOOOO COLD.

I checked my phone. It said that it was 27 degrees. Yikes. I live in California. I am not prepared for this. I looked at our front steps. They were completely iced over. Glimmering at me as if to say: “I dare you to try not to break your neck on me, Klutz.” Geez, my front steps have a really bad attitude in the morning. They are totally not morning steps.

Obviously we needed to modify. I opened our coat closet and got out the biggest, puffiest coat I could find. […]