When a neighbor calls and asks you to help harvest her vineyard in exchange for grapes… you go.  At least, I totally go. I’m usually not one to turn down fresh produce. You know this. I’ve discussed my produce sluttery. I will work for food. Period.
It’s only later when you’re staring at a very large container full of harvested grapes that you think, “huh…what now?!” Like anything fresh, grapes have a shelf life, and you need to get on it kind of quickly before they ripen themselves to death, fermenting and exploding all over each other. Time to roll up yer sleeves…
Fast forward. It’s a Saturday night. I have an eye twitch. I’ve been washing and de-stemming grapes for over an hour. My fingers are purple. I have chosen to watch the movie Stepmom while taking on this project. Uh oh, here come the waterworks. Tears mix with my grape stained hands as I wipe away sobs. Susan Sarandon didn’t have to make that extremely sentimental magicians cape for her son, did she? Whoa. Ugh. So. MUCH. Crying. My husband calls me from a bar on his business trip. I have to explain to him that I am fine, but have just made the incredibly  misguided decision to make grape jelly while watching a highly sentimental film. Nothing to worry about here (totally worry). […]